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The Thursday Thinker: Adoption

Do you think that birth moms should be allowed to sign adoption papers BEFORE their baby is born?  Why or why not?



  1. Hmm.

    The days I had to change my mind after I signed the papers were the hardest of my life. I remember wishing I had been able to sign them beforehand so that way I wouldn’t have been able to change my mind. Because you DO think about it, let me tell you. But to discover after finally seeing your child that you never want to live without them…women deserve that chance. It’s so, so hard, but signing afterwards means you’ve experienced and considered all the options, and I feel like that’s necessary for a decision you won’t regret.

    I explain it much better here: http://letterstolittleman.com/2012/02/25/the-worst-ten-days-and-the-best-nineteen-months/

    But it’s a good question!

    • I read the post from your blog. It made me cry. I hope to have my daughter read it some day to see what feelings birth moms go through. This is the part that was the most touching: “But in the end, it wasn’t about me. It wasn’t about what I would go through, or what being without you would do to me. It was about you and what was best for you.”
      I think when I posed this question about having birth moms relenquish before the baby is born I was thinking about the peace of mind it would provide for the adoptive parents and in some cases for the birth mom as well. However I understand that no woman can predict what the experience of giving birth will do to them. No woman can guess how holding thier newborn will change them. In some cases it may change their mind and make them choose to parent but in other cases it will solidfy their decision for adoption for the same reasons you had, because you cared so much for your little guy and you wanted to best life for him.
      Not an easy question, with no easy answer. Thank you for sharing!

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